“The Old Man Was Covered In Piss/Shit:” Football Horror Stories
September 14 / Dan Fogarty / SportsGrid
Football fans can be a serious, scary bunch, and when a fan shows up to a football stadium wearing the opposing team's colors, trouble is usually soon to follow. This is especially true in college football's Southeastern Conference, where the Florida Gators and Tennessee Volunteers have been locked in an intense rivalry since 1916.
This is a college football story but pretty awful. I'm from Knoxville, and a few years ago we lost to Florida like 21-20 or something ridiculously close like that. Given that this is a pretty intense rivalry and I've seen a lot of fans get their asses kicked for starting their schools chants, I figured something bad would happen. So, I'm walking back to my car and there's this old Florida fan like 20 feet ahead of me. This guy is in his 60s or so and wasn't chanting or anything, just trying to get to his car. So we pass through this alley beside the parking garage and this giant ziplock bag of some sort of concoction of piss/shit reigns down from above and lands on the dude (probably from like the 3rd story of a parking garage). It was fucking disgusting.
Oh, and also:
At the UT-Bama game one year in Alabama a fan threatened my friend that he would "slit your fucking throat and shit down it" if he cheered again and apparently flashed a knife. SEC football games can get pretty intense. This was quite a few years like maybe 8 years ago. They've toned it down a bit.
Sweet baby Jesus in a tuxedo shirt, that's rough. Kind of makes me glad that I grew up in New York City, where college sports takes a backseat to the pros. At least at Yankee Stadium, they only threaten to throw bags of piss and shit at Red Sox fans.