ESPN NFL Analyst John Clayton Has A Training Montage For That Time He Had To Throw The First Pitch At The Mariners’ Game

  • Jake O'Donnell

It’s important to have a sense of humor about yourself. Period. But for some people, it’s just that much funnier when they do. After ESPN dropped that 1980’s angsty hard rocking teen Sportscenter commercial, it became apparent that John Clayton is one of those people.

Maybe it has something to do with his football expertise vis á vis he dissimilarities with the chili swiggin’, former-pro-turned-ESPN-talking-head Mark Schlereth. (Oh, and if you don’t know who either of these people are, they talk about football for a living. One makes cameo’s on soap operas like Guiding Light. The other starred in cult classic Mac and Me.)

Either way, here he is prepping for his big day (yesterday) throwing out the first pitch at the Mariners’ game. And here’s his pitch. If it he whizzed in a fastball right on the black it’d be fitting. Alas, he threw like a girl, which, from a comedy perspective, was a pitch perfect end to the bit.

Speaking of pitches, who pitches these ideas to ESPN, or Clayton for that matter. “Hey, John, are you busy Friday? We’re thinking of lampooning your dorkiness, then sending you out onto a major league diamond to throw a baseball 90 feet in front of 20,000 people. Also, we’re gonna need those TPS reports so if you could just come in over the weekend…”

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