Pats DE Chandler Jones Inexplicably Showed Up At A Police Station Without A Shirt On
Jake ODonnell 01:59 pm, January 14th, 2016
I totally understand why someone would feel anxious during the two-week break in between the end of their regular season and an AFC Divisional Playoff Game, so I don't blame Chandler Jones for wanting to "relax" in the comfort of his own home with some "herbal remedies." I do, however, blame him for trying to do it with fake weed.
The hell is wrong with you? Nearly 90% of the National Football League smokes REAL weed and never gets caught. What possessed you to try and outsmart the system with synthetic marijuana, which can and does kill people? Weed isn't butter, which is almost identical to fake butter. Weed isn't even milk, where you can get by on the almond version. You have one option when you want to smoke weed: smoke weed. That's it.
I'm not even going to get into the possibility that he was unaware the stuff he was smoking was fake.
Luckily it's not illegal to be a complete idiot. If it was, the Patriots Super Bowl hopes would be crushed, seeing as Jones would be sharing a padded room on a craggy island with Rob "I didn't write my autobiography" Gronkowski right now.