Darrelle Revis Headed To Tampa Bay For A Physical/Blueprints On How To Rebuild A Laughing Stock NFL Franchise

  • Jake O'Donnell

Looks like Revis Island is being raided by pirates, ye scurvy dogs. According to a source close to the situation, Darrelle Revis has been cleared by the Jets to fly to Tampa to meet with a doctor.

This could mean one of two things:

1) They’re checking his ACL because he’s being traded to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers for a first round pick.

2) He’s getting breast implants because he’s self-conscious about his bust size.

Although the Jets refuse to comment on trade talks, it’s stands to reason that his departure is inevitable, given that the team *should be* in rebuilding mode, and Revis *should be* playing for a playoff team. Because let’s be honest, nobody likes to see a star spending his last few years of relevance playing for the Jets on a losing team. What’s more, the Jets would get the Bucs pick in return, giving them both the 9th and 13th — potentially adding two impactful players, who will eventually be chased out of town in a clown car by the New York Post.

Trading the best player at his position has been a difficult process for the Jets, who have been reluctant to let the $15 million per year man walk, despite it being best for all parties involved. Well, at least until September 8th, when the two teams meet at MetLife stadium for their season opener and Darelle takes one back for six. Imagine how long Revis has sat idly on the sideline, watching Mark Sanchez serve up the aerial equivalent of fois gras to opposing secondaries, wishing he could get in there and just pick off one or two.

“Please Rex, pretty please! Just one, let me just intercept just one!”

Now it looks like he’ll get his chance the next time he plays football.