The Top 8 Awful Things That Have Happened To Washington’s NFL Team This Season

  • Rick Chandler

I don’t believe in curses, the supernatural or humans shape-shifting into the form of a wolf, but something not of this world seems to be happing in Washington D.C., NFL-wise. In addition to being 3-8, Dan Snyder’s football club is being hammered by activists seeking to change its nickname, and a FedEx Field beer vendor was robbed following the MNF game at taser-point. Serenity Now!

Here are the top ten awful things that have happened to the Deadskins so far:

1. Native American nickname controversy. So far its been an absolute pummeling, and Dan Snyder is losing. Snyder managed to find four Native Americans willing to don his team’s gear prior to the game on Monday night, as the team honored Navajo Code Talkers. But already critics are complaining that it was an empty gesture, solely engineered for PR purposes. When the team goes on the road, there are actually demonstrations. RIP, Washington nickname. Even Jesse Ventura is against you.

2. FedEx Field vendor robbed at taser-point. This allegedly happened following the MNF game, and the crook is still at large. Poor vendor.

3. Unrelenting meme attacks. In addition to the brilliant one above, fans have used “Family Guy” to great effect, as well.

4. The fall of RGIII. Coming back from a knee injury is harder than you’d think. I think the screen capture below about sums up his season so far.

5. Twitter.

6. Their fans are attacking each other with hot dogs. According to police, a husband and wife argued over the guy discussing their sex life, and it ended like this. (NSFW language):

7. Injuries.

8. No free pizza toppings.