FIFA Says Qatar World Cup Was A 'Mistake' — Oh, Wait, They Took It Back, The Qatar World Cup Is Cool, Everyone

  • Eric Goldschein


Have you ever seen somebody shove a foot so far down their throat it comes out their ass? That’s what happening with FIFA and the 2022 World Cup in Qatar.

FIFA president Sepp Blatter spoke to Swiss channel RTS about the planned disaster, also known as giving Qatar the rights to host a World Cup (via The Guardian):

“Of course, it was a mistake. You know, one makes a lot of mistakes in life.

“The technical report indicated clearly that it was too hot in summer, but despite that the executive committee decided with quite a big majority that the tournament would be in Qatar.”

ONE MAKES A LOT OF MISTAKES IN LIFE. Like this decision to host the World Cup in Qatar, which has led to the deaths of thousands of people and will ruin professional soccer’s league and TV deals in 2022. In fact, we thought of plenty of reasons why the Qatar World Cup is a bad idea, and think FIFA should re-award the Cup to another country immediately. Glad you’re finally on our side, Sepp.

Oh, wait. FIFA then released a statement “clarifying” Blatter’s comments:

“The comment by the Fifa president concerning the organisation of the 2022 Fifa World Cup in Qatar to Swiss TV station RTS is in line with previous comments on this matter,” it read.

“As explained in his answer to the journalist, the president reiterated that the decision to organise the World Cup in summer was an ‘error’ based on the technical assessment report of the bid, which had highlighted the extremely hot temperatures in summer in Qatar. At no stage did he question Qatar as hosts of the 2022 Fifa World Cup.”

So what they’re saying is, it was obvious that Qatar wouldn’t be able to cool stadiums down using space-age technology, and we knew it, but whatever. That was the mistake — not giving the tournament to Qatar, specifically, but giving it to a country that’s way too fucking hot for soccer, generally. Hopefully the president’s stark admission didn’t confuse you into thinking they were admitting they were wrong.

Nothing to see here, people. Just a sporting organization that’s the equivalent of a dog licking its balls.

Photo via Getty