Luis Suarez Wants To Eat Branislav Ivanovic’s Shoulder With Some Fava Beans And A Nice Chianti (VIDEO)

  • Jake O'Donnell

Talk about leaving your mark on a game! Liverpool forward and likely owner of a beat up old van, Luis Suarez, conceded a handball penalty in the box, scored the equalizing goal, and tried to eat Chelsea right back Branislav Ivanovic in the 78th minute of Sunday’s EPL contest.

Talk about a full plate! This is the second time he’s been caught with his hand in the human-flesh-cookie-jar, though not by the officials, who missed the admittedly subtle nibble, though heard about it from Ivanovic immediately after it happened. I’m speculating the conversation between the bitee and referee went something like this:

Ivanovic: He bit me!
Referee: Oh my God.

Talk about biting off more than you can chew! Suarez could never swallow a whole man.

In all seriousness though, Suarez should be sent to timeout. Or at least punched in the face by someone. This is absolutely sociopathic behavior with zero justification. Imagine if Cal Ripken Jr. bit Paul O’Neill? Or LeBron bit Kirk Heinrich?

The game ended in a 2-2 draw.