Beaver Enters Store, Discovers The Xmas Trees Are Fake, Proceeds To Trash The Place
You probably remember when your parents brought home that first artificial Christmas tree. Admit it -- you were disappointed. The holidays were exposed as the commercial sham that they are. Outside, you just wanted the presents, but inside your childhood wilted and fell away like so many sad, brown needles.
Now, imagine if you're a beaver. This one, who we'll call Ted, entered a dollar store in Charlotte Hall, Md., and headed straight for the holiday decoration section. This is all true, by the way -- as reported by the St. Mary’s County Sheriff’s Office.
When the beaver discovered that the trees were all fake, it proceeded to destroy items on several shelves nearby.
Cpl. Yingling had a unique call for service when the suspect, pictured, was witnessed causing prop. Destruction at a store in Char. Hall. pic.twitter.com/6qKlu7tqA7
— St. Mary's Sheriff (@firstsheriff) November 30, 2016
In a statement, the Sheriff's Office attempted to make a few "The suspect attempted to flee the scene" jokes -- the kind of dad humor you'd expect, but don't want. But they did confirm that Ted was captured and released to a wildlife rehabilitation center.
It' a Lifetime Network made-for-TV Christmas movie miracle!
Of course there's also the possibility that the beaver could be Jewish.
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