We can say this pretty confidently – we wouldn’t have been this confident asking NFL commissioner Roger Goodell about how player safety was impacted by a provision about the allowed number of padded practices in the league’s new collective bargaining agreement.

What happens when our nation’s orangutans can’t agree on Giants vs. Patriots? When our local camels can’t decide between Eli Manning or Tom Brady? When our rhinos have no freaking clue who’s taking home the Lombardi trophy?

Anarchy, that’s what.

The Bill Belichick Hoodie Cupcake doesn’t care for your questions. He doesn’t care for your sass, either. If you backtalk him and his icing, he’ll tell you to look up at the score. You punk. When he defeats other, inter-divisional cupcakes, he talks trash. Not a lot of trash, but it will be pretty mean stuff. And even though he likes to party, Bill Belichick Hoodie Cupcake is all about his business — the business of being delicious. As he, his bread stump, and his hoodie frosting patrol the sidelines of your Super Bowl party, know that he won’t say much. But he’ll get results. [Kerry Martin, Darren Rovell, Cippin on Sports]

ESPN’s Chris Mortensen tweeted a short time ago that Colts (for now) quarterback Peyton Manning has been medically cleared to resume his NFL career, thereby receiving approval that was in doubt in recent days. We’re happy this would mean that one of football’s greats could keep playing (though strange that this came so soon after reports that there was a good chance he’d never play again), but sad it would mean Rob Lowe’s sources were mistaken.

Madonna, being the Super Bowl XLVI halftime show performer, took questions recently from a media throng. One reporter, though, stood out in cutting through to the important issues. [The Nosebleeds]

Shame. Shame. Shame. Tom Brady, how could you? You know the NFL supports the controversial SOPA legislation, right? I mean, sure, SOPA itself is ridiculous, but rules are rules, Tom. And after your startling admission today… I just don’t know anymore.

Gisele Bundchen is just worried for her husband, like any loving spouse would be. That husband, of course, is Tom Brady, he’s got a big game coming up on Sunday, and apparently, Gisele’s trying everything she can to send good vibes his way. Maybe she’s even trying a little too hard.

This man is a supervillain. His name is “The Tinkerer.” He is planning to take over the Super Bowl, possibly destroy it, like in that Dark Knight trailer. Because, to be honest, that’s the only way my brain can make sense of this.

The patron saint of fourth quarter comebacks, Tim Tebow, appeared on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night. And after nearly causing dozens of virgin births simply by walking out onto the stage, the Denver Broncos quarterback sat down for an interview with the excited late night host.